'annoying co-workers' Your Coworkers  

dustin michael from ohio (Contact Member) -

i work at a small business.. one of my co-workers gets on my nerves pretty bad on a daily basis. she does different things like mess with my stuff, take my chair, and slack off..

i am kind of a nice guy and don't like confrontations, but how can i get it to stop? should i just lighten up and get over it?

Comment #1 moy (63.176.159.9) -

That is where the 'nice guys' get it all wrong. It is not bad to be nice but then, clear boundaries have to be set. This particular lady must have taken you to be the 'soft type' and so thinks that she can get away with anything just because you will not raise an eyebrow.

Well, confrontations are bad, especially when they turn physical. In your case, let her know that you do not like how she behaves. She may not like it but at the end, you might end up being the best of friends.

Comment #2 HUgo (63.176.159.107) -

I always make it a point that I make bounderies with my colleagues, for sometimes they tend to be too close that they make me iiritable. Like you I also encountered a guy who would always come sit on my desk and start exploring everything that is in it.

Know what I did? I told him directly but in a nice way that I am annoyed by his practice, and then he just suddenly changed mood over me and never ever go near my stuffs.. I felt sad at first of the outcome but then I realized, i just did what i have to do.

Comment #3 moy (63.176.159.159) -

What Hugo has said is particularly hard for most people to do in a similar situation. There is a notion that the friendship already established might not flourish or end up in the drains.

I have encountered irritating habits too and even though it was really hard to voice my concerns back then, I do not steer from marking my boundaries.

If someone is sensible enough, he or she would not take it personal

Comment #4 Stop'em (63.176.159.32) -

Yes, sometimes we have to set limits on people who just can't seem to realize how to stop. If we do not act on it as early as we can those irritating people will just continue and becomes more and more irritating.

Fear of loosing a friend is never an excuse especially if you are irritated at her habits and you just show a fake smile over them, you are starting to fake them if you do that.

Comment #5 James Brady (63.176.159.0) -

Those types of fellow employees you mention are extremely valuable. They are the type of people that teach you patience so that you don´t think that you are the king of the flock.

Patience brings humility.

Comment #6 Emily Gai (63.176.159.123) -

A relative situation would be a newbie office staff versus annoying old (timers or) office co-workers. This is a hard situation as well for you are just starting in the office and would want to make a positive impression with your co-workers but you can't do so because of these pesky and annoying co-workers. Either they are making rumors about you or just plainly being obnoxious by doing things that they shouldn't.

Comment #7 cespeta (63.176.159.195) -

Hi Dustin, I can relate to where you are coming from. I myself is not the kind of confrontational. Best thing for you to do is to invite that person aybe for a snack and start a light conversation, crack some jokes and then finally tell her (with a smile) that you asked for a snack so that maybe she would behave herself well afterwards. Tell her what you are feeling about her messing up with your own stuff.

Comment #8 Janel (63.176.159.110) -

Well that sure is one peaceful way to put it cespeta. One should have a lot of courage and temper in order to talk to the people you are most annoyed of and asking them for a light-hearted talk then later breaking it to them that they are messing around with you. It is a completely different story if that annoying person is intentionally annoying you and belongs to a higher position. Now that's complicated.

Comment #9 Nicky (63.176.159.223) -

I have to agree on that Hugo, but don't you think you are being rude if you do that? I mean, they are your friends, not just a simple co workers to be the least.. so how would you do the approach in a more civil and not too harsh on her or his side..

I would still prefer to conserve our friendship, i would not want to throw everything away.

Comment #10 Sabrina (63.176.159.130) -

You should consider approaching them peacefully at first but if they persist then nothing beats a little straightforward confrontation. Or better you can go directly to the superiors to report but then again you will be teased by doing so by your co-workers. This happens a lot in the office as there are envious co-workers and the annoying one who act like they have known you for ages. Stop it now before it escalates into a more serious incident.

Comment #11 Morgan (63.176.159.116) -

Check this out, you might want to know some tips on how to avoid those annoying people

1. Listen.

A lot of conflicts are based in misunderstandings, so always make sure you’re getting everything, It can be easy enough to tune someone out when they annoy you; the trick is to use careful questioning to focus the other person on the topic at hand so they give you what you need and avoid straying too far. Poor listening leads to misunderstandings that need clarification – which means more time spent with someone you’d really rather not be around.

More tips on the link below.

• www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/7-ways-to-deal-with-annoying-people-and-still-get-things-done.html

Comment #12 Nicole (63.176.159.141) -

I also had been in a situation where i have to choose between having an enemy or to just get my used with his tongue and attitude. This person, though not in my work always annoys me, even if i just see his face i already got annoyed by her already, and if i hear his voice i just want to go out of the house and scream.. thanks god he just vanished into thin air.

Comment #13 Kaycel (63.176.159.78) -

What could be annoying than a co-worker who wants to have a romantic relationship with you when all the while both of you are engage into your own personal relationships. It is like asking for trouble when someone plays that game in the office and what probably be the result to it is something scandalous that you will end up losing either your job or your "real" partner, or worst... both.

Comment #14 Eve (63.176.159.115) -

This guy just rants all day about how much he wants to show up his boss, but he has worked at the same job receiving the very same salary for about seven years of his young life. Only about thirty years old now, he is still making just about the same amount of money as when he first started and could never stop talking about how much he's going to show his boss who is boss.

Comment #15 Bugged by 'Her' (63.176.159.18) -

Know what, there are so many annoying people in the world. And now i would like everyone to know how i am annoyed with this person. She is so impossible. She is so overprotective that i felt she just want us to live according to her will, what does she thinks of herself, a dictator, sometimes i have this feeling that she is the reincarnation of Hitler. My god she bugs me all the time.

Comment #16 Office Princess (63.176.159.233) -

You know what is more annoying? It is when you own a family business with a "former" friend turns to monster... of course not literally that is. Me and my husband have this family business and we hired and made our close friend as operations manager and as time passes he turned out to be a complete jerk. Making decisions without informing me. He completely disregard me on important office functions. I tried addressing this to my husband and he already talk to him and I'll now observe him.

Comment #17 Eve (63.176.159.92) -

That's some incredible nonsense that you are in the middle of there, Office Princess. I do hope that thing turn around soon, because such a crappy circumstance would really very much annoy me too.

Comment #18 Pinky (63.176.159.86) - Sun Dec 13 21:31:17 2009

Hi there Bugged by Her.. I just wish you managed to let us know who this "she" you are talking about. But reading your post i got a clue, and thought of 'she' as your mom, aunt or your elder sister, am i right?

Know what, sometimes when we thought of our parents being so overprotective and strict, we got annoyed. But when the right time comes, you will realize how lucky you were having them by your side to guide and protect you.

Comment #19 Shalimar (63.176.159.217) - Tue Dec 22 15:00:37 2009

for Bugged by 'Her' 's situation

I think your office mate is just trying to get your attentions. Are you snubbing her at your workplace or even outside the four walls of your office. Maybe she is the talking type and you're the silent type. Maybe you could try to be friends with one another which for me, better than having more misunderstandings in the future. Good luck to you my friend.

Comment #20 Eirich Since (63.176.159.198) - Sun Dec 27 22:40:00 2009

I have nothing against groupies on the office but what annoys me is when they group around and talk about co-workers. Spread malicious rumors about them and laugh at them without them knowing it. I used to accompany one common friend (at a different division in the office) to their usual groupie lunch out and was really shock at how can they be so vulgar in talking about rumors and making up one.

Comment #21 Liezel (63.176.159.79) - Thu Jan 14 20:11:29 2010

That is very true Eirich, there are indeed lots of people like that in the office scene. You will see them in group and then talk about a certain people and worst make stories about them. I hate being talked about so I do not do this with people. I just hope that they just put their mind only to their works and not to those silly nonsense, it is really annoying.

Comment #22 Tatiana (63.176.159.231) - Mon Feb 8 13:05:10 2010

We have to face reality here guys. Even though these co-workers do get on our nerves we can't just hit them straight in the face or confront them which could later worsen up the situation. You could avoid them if you can, but most recommended thing is to try understanding them, if not befriend them in order to get to know and make a more lighter working environment and when you do become friends, maybe that is the time to suggest to him/her to change some of his annoying traits. If you can't beat them, join them, then beat them.

Comment #23 Sammy (109.111.97.144) - Sun Mar 7 19:52:25 2010

You have a very good suggestion there Tatiana. I think the best thing to do is to befriend them, avoiding them is not the solution because you work in the same office everyday so you cannot avoid them that easily. Maybe by befriending them, you can stop them from talking on your back, and you will know why they are like that. Have a great day people and keep posting.

Comment #24 sangam (115.248.0.162) - Mon Mar 8 09:30:59 2010

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